Sit down, Son. Let's have a talk. Your mother tells me you've been asking lots of questions about where babies come from. See, here's the—uh—here's how it works. When a man and a woman decide they're ready to have a kid, well, one has a penis, while the other has a vagina. When you put the two together, a bunch of little semen run from one and into the other. They then race to see which one will actually get to turn into a kid some day.
Getting tired of easy mobile games? Think you can handle swinging between soaring victory and crushing defeat? Then perhaps you are ready to experience Cardinal Quest 2, the newest Roguelike RPG to hit the Play Store. Take control of one of six different characters and see how far you can make it before dying a horrible death.
Roguelike games are characterized by turn-based combat, simple graphics, randomly generated levels, and permanent death.
There have been a few releases of the modern style of music and dancing games on Android, like Guitar Hero. Of course, they're somewhat limited by the nature of the platform - use rhythm and timing all you want, but you're still basically limited to taps and swipes. Ubisoft has found a way around that for its lucrative Just Dance series: it uses your phone as a basic controller for the browser version of the game, Let's Dance Now.
There's a new Asphalt game available from Gameloft! But fans of the previous titles might not be so thrilled with the latest one. While Asphalt 8: Airborne was more or less a clone of arcade racers like Need For Speed, Asphalt Overdrive is a lane-based, candy-coated "endless" racer, with the player running away from cops in a Day-Glo take on 1980s California. It's a free download for Android 4.0 or higher.
The Humble people are on a roll. In addition to the Humble Bundle for PC and Android 11 announced just yesterday, they've launched a new Android-only bundle for cash-strapped gamers to enjoy. (You don't have to be cash-strapped, I suppose you might just be cheap and altruistic.) Bundle 8 includes seven games at the moment, with two being "above the average price" purchases and a third unlocking at a reasonable $5.
Welcome to the latest entry in our Bonus Round series, wherein we tell you all about the new Android games of the day that we couldn't get to during our regular news rounds. Consider this a quick update for the dedicated gamers who can't wait for our bi-weekly roundups, and don't want to wade through a whole day's worth of news just to get their pixelated fix. Today we've got an interesting timing-based tower builder, a card game that's better with friends, and another somewhat masochistic minimal title.
The newest Humble Bundle is out and it's a big one. Humble Bundle for PC and Android 11 includes a whopping ten games right now, with more coming soon. All the titles are available on PC/Mac/Linux and Android with no DRM. There are also Steam keys for most platforms. All you have to do is decide how much to pay.
The Anomaly games gained attention not only because they are staggeringly gorgeous, but because the gameplay was a clever twist on the age-old tower defense genre. Past games had you playing as the creeps fighting through the towers, but Anomaly Defenders is more traditional—you're in control of the towers, but it's the humans you're fighting, not aliens.
Imagine if the little robot guys from Batteries Not Included had their own videogame. Now imagine if that video game was produced in the current framework of indie games, which seem to favor the dark and somewhat creepy atmosphere of a Lorne Lanning title. Now you've got Unmechanical, a 2D platformer with Unreal 3D graphics that has just been published to the Google Play Store. You can pick it up for $3 with no in-app purchases.