Here it is, the second installment of Android Police Files. We're still getting a steady stream of email, and while we can't post them all, we've hand-picked eight more to share with our darling readers. As you're about to see, many people can't seem to grasp what it is we do. We're not crime fighters, nor are we IT ninjas. We blog. Still, that doesn't mean we don't try our best to help out.
We get a lot of mail over the course of each day, but some inquiries and tips are simply better than others. Below is a batch of what we consider the cream of the crop. If there's anything to take away from these letters, it's that people assume we have more power than we do. We can't remote login to your Android devices, even if you ask nicely, and if we knew the reasons behind every delayed online purchase, we'd be much happier people.
Have you heard? The popped collar is coming back. But that's sooo last year now that we have Google Glass. Presenting: 5 popped Google Glasses (combined current value of $7,500 or more like $8k if you count taxes), because having 4 popped Glasses on isn't nearly as cool.
Paradox Interactive, a well-known game publisher and developer, today posted up a promo video for the upcoming ship battling game Leviathan: Warships. If you watch only one video today, let it be this one. Kittens and puppies can wait till tomorrow. I haven't had this much fun watching trailers ever since the unfortunate fireworks accident at the nearby trailer park.
Paradox Interactive's previous Android project, Magicka, is sitting at 4.8/5.0 after over 100 reviews, so needless to say, I'm pretty excited about their next game.
Man, Google. You just can't stop screwing with Christmas, can you? First you cancel December, and now this? In a very real and totally serious bug report over on Google Code, one user is reporting a serious flaw in Android: If you use the Emoji keyboard to enter a Santa face, he looks decidedly unhappy. Emotionless at best. But, as everyone knows, "Santa should be jolly."
Okay, yes, so Google did fix that Calendar problem, and even went out of its way to build a special Santa Tracker, after Norad hired that other search engine.
Look, folks, today is the perfect day to watch a light-hearted video of a real-life fruit ninja chopping fruit, getting smacked in the face with bananas, avoiding bombs like the plague, all topped with adorable kittens flying by in slo-mo. In fact, any day is the perfect day to watch that, especially when it's accompanied by a Dubstep sound track. Still not convinced? Fine, I'll give you two more reasons. It's a Sunday before the laziest and least productive week of the year, and it's Christmas Eve Eve.
Update: Several of you have pointed out that this same visual could be accomplished by holding a Galaxy Nexus in your right hand, with the pinky wrapped around the bottom of the phone. I tried this with a phone of comparable width, and it's pretty hard to emulate the image here to a reasonably precise degree. But, I'd say it is possible, though I think this interpretation is at least a little funnier (here's how I'm picturing it).
If seeing a company's executive chairman performing a vaguely-sexual, somewhat-equestrian dance for a room full of South Korean employees doesn't make stock prices soar, I honestly can't fathom what would. Eric Schmidt, seen below getting his white-boy groove on Gangnam style, was in Korea to discuss Google's new product Google Pelvic Thrusts. Unbeknownst to the former-CEO, while inside Korean borders, if a person discusses any form of lower abdominal movements, the entire room is legally required to break out in the trendy song and dance.