15
Jul
unnamed

Long, long ago, in a forest far away, there lived a squirrel (I can't say for sure which forest it was, or which squirrel in particular, so you'll just have to trust me on this one). And this squirrel loved nuts. Hard nuts, soft nuts, furry nuts, big nuts, small nuts, black nuts, white nuts, red nuts...he just loved nuts. He thought about nuts all the time. He went to sleep thinking of nuts, and woke thinking of nuts. He dreamed of nuts. Sometimes, he would even search for nuts on the internet.

If you're like our squirrel friend here, and you're nuts for nuts, then you should probably check out Nuts - a new vertical endless runner for Android. The game has been around on iOS for a while now (and has over 10 million downloads), and those guys seem to love Nuts.

If you're curious about how you'd feel about Nuts - and I'm sure many of you are - then you can find it at the link below. It's free, but there are IAPs, most likely for power ups and the like. Maybe even for bigger nuts.

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Cameron Summerson
Cameron is a self-made geek, Android enthusiast, horror movie fanatic, musician, and cyclist. When he's not pounding keys here at AP, you can find him spending time with his wife and kids, plucking away on the 6-string, spinning on the streets, or watching The Texas Chainsaw Massacre on repeat.

  • http://www.androidpolice.com/author/eric-ravenscraft/ Eric Ravenscraft
    • http://www.androidpolice.com/author/cody-toombs/ Cody Toombs

      I will be looking at this every morning for a month. It's just perfect.

      • http://www.androidpolice.com/author/eric-ravenscraft/ Eric Ravenscraft

        I don't know how it loaded the preview twice but I'm happy that it did.

        • ruthwlandrum

          just before I looked at the receipt ov $8130 , I
          didn't believe that my sister woz like actualy bringing in money part-time from
          there pretty old laptop. . there aunts neighbour has been doing this 4 only
          about 22 months and at present repayed the mortgage on their appartment and
          bought themselves a Chrysler . see here C­a­s­h­f­i­g­.­C­O­M­

    • Lisa R. Johnson

      my&nbspfriend's&nbspsister&nbspΜ­­­­­­а­­­­­­κ­­­­­­℮­­­­­­ѕ&nbsp$­­­­­­­74/հ­­­­­­օ­­­­­­υ­­­­­­r&nbspon&nbspthe&nbspс­­­­­­օ­­­­­­Μ­­­­­­р­­­­­­υ­­­­­­τ­­­­­­℮­­­­­­r.&nbspShe&nbsphas&nbspbeen&nbspwithout&nbspW­­­­­­օ­­­­­­r­­­­­­κ&nbspfor&nbspnine&nbspΜ­­­­­­օ­­­­­­ո­­­­­­τ­­­­­­հ­­­­­­ѕ&nbspbut&nbsplast&nbspΜ­­­­­­օ­­­­­­ո­­­­­­τ­­­­­­հ&nbspher&nbspр­­­­­­а­­­Уcheck&nbspwas&nbsp$­­­­­­­14256&nbspjust&nbspW­­­­­­օ­­­­­­r­­­­­­κing&nbspon&nbspthe&nbspс­­­­­­օ­­­­­­Μ­­­­­­р­­­­­­υ­­­­­­τ­­­­­­℮­­­­­­r&nbspfor&nbspa&nbspϜ­­­­­­℮­­­­­­W&nbspհ­­­­­­օ­­­­­­υ­­­­­­rs.&nbspThis&nbspѕ­­­­­­і­­­­­­τ­­­­­­℮,...&nbsphttp://Googleprojectjob&#x32&#48&#x31&#52Majory75D0Q...

      ☛☛☛ ☛�☛☛ ☛☛☛ ☛�☛☛ ☛☛☛

      • Stephan Reich

        Spam

  • alacrify

    Take the Tim Cook line out. You're supposedly an adult, and that's just asinine. And I'll cheer for a good juvenile joke any day. If it's funny.

    • mateor

      Downvote to the joke police!

    • http://www.androidpolice.com/ Artem Russakovskii

      With over 10 million downloads on iOS, Tim Cook just might love Nuts. And so will millions of other people.

      • alacrify

        Ok, change the sentence to Bill Gates. Same impact? Then the comment doesn't stand on its own, it's a tacky joke.

        • http://www.androidpolice.com/ Artem Russakovskii

          Why would he change it to Bill Gates? Tim Cook is in charge of the iOS store where Nuts has racked up 10 million downloads, not Bill Gates.

          • alacrify

            Sorry. Maybe I should have started with "since Tim Cook is gay, I find the comment about him loving Nuts inappropriate". Or insensitive. Or, as previously stated, juvenile and asinine. I thought it detracted from the review.

          • http://www.androidpolice.com/ Artem Russakovskii

            This fact was unknown to me until someone else pointed it out (or at least that it was suggested by a TV news anchor who has been repeatedly banging his head on every wall he could see since that Cook could be indeed gay). Now what looked like a relatively harmless joke may be misconstrued as something else, so I had instructed Cameron to remove it.

          • alacrify

            Thanks - I did check again before posting my original comment, and public statement aside, it seemed like public opinion made it seem like it was better to avoid the joke entirely. Sorry if I stated it too aggressively to start with. I thought it was "general tech buzz" these days.

          • http://www.androidpolice.com/ Cameron Summerson

            In all honesty, I didn't realize there was a recent controversy over this, either. Either way, it's gone now.

          • DonEmu

            Tim Cook is gay?

            That aside, should it matter?

            Isn't the person making an issue of his sexuality you?

    • oneyedmonkey

      ...

  • Pooka-kun

    Another Android wannabe port of an app that was around on the worst OS a lot of money could buy. Hey, notice the trend?

  • Full Time Titty Master

    Enough of these Freemium Endless Runners, They are killing gaming, the people that play them are below Casual Gamers, I call them Brainless Robot Gamers

    • http://www.androidpolice.com/author/eric-ravenscraft/ Eric Ravenscraft

      "Only people who like the kinds of games I like should be allowed to play games."

      • Brian

        I wholeheartedly unironically agree with this statement.

    • Emile’sGhost

      Says the guy with the nickname of a 10 year old.

      • Full Time Titty Master

        Say's the guy that believes in the paranormal

  • http://www.baronsofbullshit.com/ seriosbrad

    Thought this was conker's bad fur day related for some reason. Disappointed.

    • Badouken

      Literally the first thing I thought of when I saw that picture.

  • Kurama91

    looks fun. downloading... Thanks AP. that's why I visit AP Countless times a day. worth every second!

  • Damian

    I want Limbo on Android, are they going to release it on our platform? Do they know that Android exist?

    • Badouken

      Limbo and Bastion would be cool. Infinity Blade would be kinda cool as well but seems way less likely than the other two.

      • DonEmu

        Makers of Infinity Blade pretty much said they won't release for Android. Blamed piracy.

        Surprised Limbo isn't already on android though.

        • Badouken

          Ya I remember that which is hilarious because its not much harder to pirate on iOS, at least at the time of him saying that. Im sure if they were to be asked again they would say something like "we are having difficulty optimizing for all the different devices, resolutions, chips, ect... "

          • DonEmu

            They just aren't interested in the android market.

          • Badouken

            Exactly

          • primalxconvoy

            Ie: lazy and undeserving of our empathy or care.

  • mgamerz

    Looks like the squirrel from Click Clock Woods in Banjo Kazooie.

  • Nuts

    Hilariously written article. But there need to be more nuts in it.

  • kidkaracho

    This article was nuts!

  • flosserelli

    "iOS users love Steve Jobs' & Tim Cook's nuts..."

    FTFY

  • primalxconvoy

    I'd rather play "Conker's Bad Fur Day" or "Mr Nuts".

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