Update: As we suspected, this really isn't official. In fact, it's a fan render that was published on The Verge's forums two and a half months ago. Mystery solved! (Thanks, c3vzn!)

-- end of update

The closer spring gets, the more rumors we can expect to see about Samsung's next-Next Big Thing (TM). Today's alleged leak comes to us via Twitter, and let's not beat around the bush - this is almost certainly not the Galaxy S IV. We'll begin where any photo analysis starts: the pixels. Take a look at the USB port in particular.

If this picture is from Samsung, then it was made early enough in the design process that the graphic artist here knows his work will never see the light of day. To say nothing of the literally impossible lighting angles (which apparently results in identical reflections whether the device is standing up or lying down), the USB port is surrounded by a white glow and, judging by the front and rear shots, it is just a gash cut into the hardware.

Try it for yourself. Grab your phone and hold it at the angles shown above. At best, the USB port should be barely visible from one side, not sticking out clearly and obviously from both. The "SAMSUNG" logo just looks wrong, too - the spacing of the letters is far too wide. The phone also appears to have three speaker grilles on the front (two on the bottom, one on top), which really doesn't make much sense.

Moving past the weird Photoshop job, some of the specs seem similarly out of place. Samsung has been trying to steer clear of "TouchWiz," opting instead for "Nature UX." Also, the phone appears to be wrapped in a metallic casing which is very far from typical Samsung design language. In fact, it's the kind of thing that places itself firmly in the "wish fulfillment" area of rumors. That category of "leaks" that seem entirely incredible on their face, but we cover them anyway because, gosh darn it! We want it to be real!

Most of the things that this slide claims will be in the next iteration of the Galaxy S family is either expected or predictable: more RAM (depending on your market), new Gorilla Glass, and maybe a 5" 1080p display.

However, no one expects "Bluetooth 5.0" to be featured on the GS4. Especially since Bluetooth 5.0 doesn't even exist.

This isn't the Galaxy S IV, guys. Sorry. Nothing to see here. Move along.